Ranger Holly

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Dream of a new reality

Me on Table Mountain, almost to the top. The way down was definitely harder than the way up, so maybe that’s something to think about. Photo by Jenn.

A few weeks ago, I climbed Table Mountain with Jenn and two other lovely ladies. It was 18.8 miles and 10 hours of hiking. It was not easy at all but the journey was more than worth the physical and emotional toil. It showed me how strong I am and how determined to keep going that I really am and it is providing me a useful analogy for this year.

Suddenly, it’s Aug. 1, 2020. I am sitting on my bed with Buttercup a-snooze near my feet. I’m still in my PJs and I have my headphones on listening to the few songs I have on my August playlist.

August is usually the month of the year that I look forward to celebrating all the joys of my life. I live it up and immerse myself in frivolity. This year it snuck up on me while I was pushing through the indescribable turmoil of 2020.

I have no grandiose plans this month. My plans are to stay healthy and safe and sane by whatever means that takes. And I suppose those are the same plans I have had every August, they’re just simplified now.

This year there are no concerts to wrap myself up in. There’s no trip planned anywhere. There’s just the perpetual act of facing reality every day. I am also determined to get really creative and really grateful. One of my assignments for a seminar I am taking via Zoom is to cultivate a sense of awe and wonder in every area of my life, so I will do that too.

I’m wishing I had more to offer everyone right now. However, there’s just so much going on in the world that the only thing I have to offer is to keep enjoying life. Do the hard work of standing up for justice and then make time for the joy of life – whatever that looks like for you.

Start by giving yourself grace. Heaps of it. We’re all operating at a new level of stressed out that we’ve adjusted to and forgotten that we’re in full-on survival mode. I’m committed to switching gears. Obviously, I’m surviving. I’m still here. I am helping my communities and I am working every day for a better future. So good, check that off the list. I am surviving a massively chaotic year.

Now it’s time to thrive. What does that mean? For me, it means I won’t be looking over my shoulder in fear. I won’t be worrying about what is going to happen next. I will practice being present in the here and now. That sounds overly simple and a little played out, but it remains all I have. Me and a cat a-snooze on the bed.

This week I started thinking about goals and dreams again. I realized I gave my power away to the pandemic, to the chaos across the country, to the antics of the government. These things do not define my life and it is my job to remain faithful and to keep dreaming. A few days ago, I wrote in my journal: “A goal is a dream of a new reality.” Or as Cinderella put it, “A dream is a wish your heart makes.”

This is important because I had stopped letting myself dream. I was only surviving day to day. Dreams are essential to thriving, it gives me a reason to make it through the day to day living. I remember many times I have read about people in the most dire of circumstances saying that they held on to their ability to dream and that is what got them through extreme and life-threatening experiences.

My dream of a new reality looks like everyone being treated equally; it’s kindness for all; it’s abundant opportunities for everyone; it’s peace; it’s health; it’s fairness for every living organism. It’s an uphill climb, no doubt about that. And it’s the climb that I am on. It’s the climb that I have committed myself to and it’s the climb that I absolutely will not quit.

As always, I send you my love. I wish to send you hope and faith, too, and the ability to remain resilient even when the chips are further down than we’ve seen before.

For August, I am bringing back one of my favorite things: The Casual Sunday Beer. If that’s all I do to celebrate this month, well then that’s simply enough for me because it is a huge blessing to afford it and enjoy it.

Note: Thank you to Abe for texting me a rocket ship yesterday and saying it was “because we are going for our dreams!” You reminded me how important that really is. Casual Sunday Beers on me.